Remember Me When I'm Old

Another night at work... killing time writing test plans and stock piling the OverTime to help pay for the Adoption.

The only one who may remember me when I'm old and gray

I suppose I should be happy that I CAN work copious amounts of overtime to help pay for our 2nd adoption.  I understand that not everyone has this option.

I had a very cunning plan for getting old, and yes, it involves adoption.

See, I figured with 3 or so children, that there would be at least 1 of those children who would love me when I'm old and take care of me when I needed it.  You know, someone to put me in a nice home when I can't remember where my house went.  Someone to help feed me when I have no teeth.  Someone to help me remember my name when my wife isn't around to keep calling my name (to tell me to turn off the bathroom light, lock the doors, etc).

My brilliant cunning plan (yes, it went from just plain cunning to BRILLIANT *and* cunning in the last 30 seconds) took another big step forward when we decided to add our 4th child.  See, with 4 children, I had even a BETTER chance of 1 of the children actually being there to take care of me when I am that old and decrepit.

Now, with our 5th child on the way... I was feeling pretty confident that I would be WELL looked after as I gracefully stride into my twilight years.  At least 1 of our 5 children will love me, have pity on me, and look after me...

However, the astute among you may have noticed that I am at work.  Trying to finish paying for the 1st adoption, while saving up for the 2nd adoption, while trying to pay the bills for the broken car, septic tank, and outstanding bills.  Focus on the "at work" part of that though.

See, my brilliant cunning and down right genius plan had 1 flaw... It required me to actually be at home WITH my children so they WOULD remember me when I'm old.  At the current rate of my OverTime VS Unpaid Bills, I might not be able to see my beautiful children until the youngest is 33... or so... right around the age where the girls should be allowed to start dating.

Unfortunately for my brilliant cunning and down right genius and enlightened plan, 33 is well past the critical bonding phases of childhood - and as such, my children may feel very little attachment to me when I am older.  In essence, they might forget about me...

So, here I am... working copious amounts of over time to pay for our adoptions so that in our twilight years, my wife can be well looked after by our 27 children while I suffer away in poverty unable to remember who I am, where I am, how I got there, or who my family is... but hey... the kids are worth it.

:-)  Now... If you don't mind excusing me, my 3rd shift is about to start...

How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love the Chaos

Wife:  I have to head back to Winnipeg for a couple of weeks.

Me:  Sure, no problem.  Here, let me help you pack the bags for the kids.

Wife:  Oh no, the kids are staying here.

Me:  hahahaa... oh, for a second there, I thought you said the kids were staying here.

Wife:  They are.

Me:  hahaha... oh, that's funny.  Oh, wait... you're serious?!  Me?  12 days?!  ME!?  KIDS!  12 DAYS?!

Looks cute... wait till Mom is gone!

How many of you ladies have a husband?  Lets see your hands.

Right, great.  Now, how many of your husbands are actually CAPABLE to take care of the kids... alone... without your help?

Okay, a few hands went down.  Now, how many of THOSE husbands can take care of the kids for more than 2 days?

Few more hands go down... and how many of those husbands can do it while still keeping the house clean, and the kids dressed, and bathed and fed, and to school on time and all that good stuff?

Hmmmm... interesting.  Not many hands left in the air.

Well, I did.  4 kids.  12 days.  No wife.

The kids had 3 good meals a day, all got to school on time, bathed routinely, house kept clean, I even got the kids to play dates, drama clubs, hosted a Chinese New Years party...

Yup.  I was pretty darned proud of myself.

See, totally in full control here.  :-)

Now, I know probably 98% of the readers here are women... I'm sure I'm not getting any sympathy, or "Oh wow, you did all that?!"... because I'm pretty sure this is what you guys do every day, all day, without credit*.

So, if I'm not out here looking for sympathy, where am I going with all this?  Good question.  A better question would be, how many of you still have your hands up?  And why did you guys ever raise your hand in the first place... its not like I can see you.  :-)

See, I felt confident that I could mange 12 days with no wife.  My wife however?  Well... by the 2nd day she was gone, I had strangers from some Internet Forum she is a part of emailing me to make sure I remembered to bath the kids.  I had someone else call whom I don't know, to remind me that the kids needed to be bathed at least once a week, my neighbour came by to remind me that the kids had skating on Thursday for school and needed to bring their ice skates.  I had another neighbor driving by the house and called in to make sure everything was OK because the "... cars looked funny in the drive way, and your wife told me to check on you."

Don't get me wrong, there were times where my little Ping pushed me to the limit - right from the moment the door closed behind the wife Ping started fighting about everything.  Things which she has not fought over for months, all of a sudden were a problem for her.  She was back to stomping her feet, and getting angry at the slightest thing and looking for something to hit me with.  But thats not really the point I'm rambling about today... but a good one to remember: although our children may seem "ok", they can regress at anytime because of some significant changing in their world (ie: the Mom leaving for 2 weeks).  That might be a good topic for a later post.

A fight about to start?  Thankfully, no.  6 months ago?  Probably.

What I really learned from these 12 days of Wifeless living (and surviving with passing colours) is:

• My wife had quite happily already decided what I was and was not capable of handling (my wife had placed limitations on me)
• Although I am *cough* *cough* years old, there are still things I'm learning to do, or at least learning to do better (I am still learning what my limitations are)
• My wife can get people from Flordia, USA to check on me in Ontario, Canada - yet unable to get out of bed to turn off the bathroom light (she can however get ME to get out of bed to turn off the bathroom light)
• No matter what age we are, we can grow and do things others did not think we were capable of (limitations change, can be over come, or might not have really existed)
• I was right, my wife was wrong
• What my wife thought about my abilities to handle the household were not important - what was important is how I did handle the household (limitations are only limitations if we choose to listen to them)
• Sometimes, you need to be challenged to realise what you are capable of
• If my wife isn't here to tell me to, I can go 4 days without showering, 3 without changing clothes, 2 without eating and 1 without coffee

When we look at adoption, how many limitations are we placing on ourselves, our children, or possible children?

Do we look at our adopted child and say to ourselves that they will never be "whole", or that they will always "suffer with attachment issues"?

Do we look at ourselves and maybe think "will I be able to truly love our adopted child?"

Do we look at a child with cleft lip and think "they will never be accepted?"

Are those valid fears/questions/concerns/limitations?  Sure.  Absolutely.  I had every right to be scared to be left alone with 4 children... they are scary.  They make strange noises.  Eat strange things.  They stay up all night, or wake up at weird times of the day!  The can bite, colour on walls (or Dads... hey, its happened!), tie you up with duct tape and leave you in the back yard for the wild animals of Canada to attack... I mean kids are scary stuff!  Anyone who tells you different, isn't a parent.  :-)

Don't let the cuteness fool you - they can be scary!

But I refuse to be limited by fears... because I think thats what all those questions, concerns and limitations really are - fears.  What would have happened if I was to afraid to watch the children for 12 days without the wife?  Well, my wife would have missed her fathers funeral.  And it is easy to look at a death in the family and say "suck it up for 12 days you wuss".

But... what would have happened if I was to afraid to adopt a child with Spina Bifida?  What if I listened to that fear that said "you can't do it", "that child is going to have problems", "she must have a better suited family out there somewhere", "we can't adopt a child that old", "we can't afford to adopt", and the list goes on.  What if I listened to all my concerns and self imposed limitations?

Well, I would have missed out on one of the the single greatest experiences of my life - my beautiful daughter Ping; and she would have missed out on us**.

* Thank you, by the way.   We men and children might forget to say it, but you make everything "work".

** If you are a regular reader on our family blog, you would know that her missing "me" might not be that big of a deal.  I'm still wearing her down.

Ask A Yeti: First Question

Dear Mr. Yeti,
 
I have a question that I have been wondering about....
 
It seems to me the Yeti's have big fat fingers....how do you manage to type so much....and even throw features like bold, italics, underlines?  I even think I have seen some bold underlined italics......
 
Thanks,
Rob

Oh right, like I've never heard that before!  Being a Yeti dose add some complications when trying to fit into a humans world.  Keyboards are notoriously small.  Don't even think about asking how we type on our Palm Pre Smart Phone!  

Soemtims when there are spelling mistakes in our typing, epople asume that its beacuse we Yetis are un-intelligent. Or, that we don't understand the english language as it is not our native tongue.  Neither of these facts be true.  Yetis are born communicators.  We have to be.  We travel so very far, alone, in search of other Yeti that we have to be able to communicate over great distances.  Male Yetis never ask for directions either (a trait I hear Human males share with us), so sometimes we have to go months wandering around alone until we stumble upon another male Yeti where we can then ask for directions in safety.  Even during these lonely months, we often communicate with ourselves (sometimes mistaken as crazy, Yetis can be seen talking (and sometimes answering) themselves for these weeks on end) just to keep the Yeti mind active.  No,  any spelling mistakes in a Yetis typing is the results of our "big fat fingers", or the Lepricons.

Yes, the Lepricons.  Yetis are very resourceful.  We catch Lepricons and force them to type our emails.  Lepricons however, are horrible spellers and typists, but their fingers fit the keyboards.  And there be no Lucky Charms for them unless they finish their typing.  It's also the Lepricons who add the bold, italics, underlines, and yes, the bold underlined italics... (we won't even talk about the different font sizes or colours!).  Lepricons are horrible showmen.  Always running around showing off, "oooh you can't catch me!", or "look at my rainbow!  Isn't it colourful!".  Horrible showmen.  Always having to be fancy and such.  Drives us Yeti crazy.

So, quick recap of the email.  Yes, we have fat fingers.  We have Lepricons type for us.  Lepricons like the fancy effects.  Lepricons make a tasty mid-noon snack.  Wait, that last bit wasn't part of the email?

Yetilly yours, 

The Yeti

Oh ENOUGH the the colours, and bold underlined italics already!  Silly Lepricons!

Ask A Yeti: Intro to the Ask

So I've been thinking of starting something on the blog called "Ask a Yeti" - where you, the good readers of Forever Family can ask the Yeti questions related to life, love and/or adoption.

Don't expect serious answers, but something on the "lighter" side.

So there you have it... if there is anything you've ever wanted to ask the Yeti about life, love and/or adoption, go ahead and hit the button!  Questions which peak the Yetis interest will be answered here on the blog.  :-)

Send your questions to The Yeti (ask.a.yeti@gmail.com)who will answer them on the Forever Family blog
I would think good questions to ask would be things along the line of "Yeti, how did you ever become so awesome?!", or "Yeti, how do you really feel about lawyers?", etc, etc, etc...
NOTE:  The Yeti's views do not represent the official views or thoughts, opinions of the Forever Family Blog, the Yetis wife, or generally intelligent people who think before they speak, or have at least the IQ of a rock.  The Yeti should not be held responsible for his thoughts or actions... he is a Yeti after all.
NOTE 2:  The Yeti apologizes in advance for the multitude of people who will most likely be offended by his so call humor... and any resemblances between people in the Ask A Yeti comments and people real or imaginary are purely coincidental... unless they are not.  In which case, they would be purely intentional.

Wife Gets Back in ... 1 hour!

So it looks like we survived the two weeks with out the Mommy.

The house is still standing.
The kids have been well fed.
Bathed.
Cleaned.
And still having fun.

Today was a looooong day with Ping though.  Wow.  Fights, calling her sister names, stomping feet, growling, etc.  Good stuff.  The wife can't get here soon enough!  And for tomorrow?  I'm going to let the children catch up with their mother.  :-)

Thanks to Marg and Nancy who sent over food.  I would have felt offended, as if you thought that I could not handle two weeks being alone with 4 children, but as it turns out, I really did need the food... and sometimes, pride has to take a back seat to exhaustion.

So, to all the Moms out there - good on ya!  We love you and everything that you do, that we all take for granted.  For being the 1st line of defense (or offensive) in dealing with the children, to being the last one to sit down at the dinner table.  You rock.

There, now, between this post and surviving the two weeks with the kids, I'm taking myself to Cancun for 5 days and 4 nights... and NOT feel guilty.  :-)

Barbie Down! We've got a Barbie Down!

Boy Barbies are all the rage over at our house lately.  I don't know quite what it is about these Boy Barbies, I think it all started because we originally only had the 1 Ken doll.

The two girls *always* wanted to play with the Ken doll... thousands of GIRL Barbies... but no... they fight over the 1 Ken doll.  siiiiigh...  Anyway, this Christmas we got each of the girls a couple of boy Barbies, thinking "well, that fight is over..."

*ring* *ring* *ring*
Me:  Hello.
K:  Hey Dad, it's me.  Where are you?
Me:  Just at the store, I should be home in 20.
K:  Oh, well, Ping is really upset.
Me:  Why?  Is she giving you grief?
K:  Well, no... not really.  She broke G's boy barbie.
Me:  Oooooh... that's not good.
K:  Yea, well, she is just crying now.  Curled up in a small ball on the stairs and won't let me come close to her.
Me:  Alright, well, just stay close to her.
K:  I can't, when I get close, she starts yelling at me.
Me:  Aaaah, I see.  Well, just stay "close" without touching her.  Just stay in the same room so she doesn't feel alone.
K:  Okay.
Me:  Oh, what broke on it?  Can I fix it?
K:  No, the arm snapped off.  The plastic is broken in half.
Me:  'Aight, thanks.
*click*

Oh crap.  Now I have to tell G that her boy Barbie is broken.  I think it would probably be easier to tell a mother that her son has lost his arm while serving in some war torn country than to tell G that her sister broke her boy Barbie.

Me:  G, I got some bad news.
G:  What is it Daddy?
Me:  Well, you know how sometimes in life, things happen that we don't really have any control over.
G:  Uh-huh.
Me:  And some of those things can be bad.  Like, really bad.
G:  Uh-huh.
Me:  And some of those bad things, are accidents, right.  No one meant to do anything bad.
G:  Uh-huh.
Me:  And, well, Ping broke your boy Barbie.

It was here I was expecting a water show.  I was expecting G to throw her head back, fall to her knees and scream NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! at the top of her lungs...

G:  Oh.  Well, it was an accident.
Me:  Yea.  You ok?
G:  Yup.

And thats about where I wanted to cry.  G was being really cool with this.

*ring* *ring* *ring*
Me:  Hey.  Whats up K?
K: *mumble mumble mumble*
Me:  uh-huh... mmmm... yea...  okay, put her on the phone.
Ping:  *crying*
Me:  Hey baby, you broke G's boy barbie?
Ping:  YES!
Me:  That's OK.  We will talk about it when I get home.  But no one is mad at you.
Ping:  YES!  YES YOU MAD!
Me:  Am I mad?
Ping:  YES!
Me:  Am I yelling?  Am I being mean?
Ping:  NO!
Me:  So am I mad?
Ping:  NO!  BUT G.  G IS MAD!
Me:  No G isn't mad.
Ping:  BUT YESTERDAY SHE YELL AT ME.
Me:  No, that isn't about the boy Barbie.  Is G mad at you right now?
Ping:  NO!
Me:  Okay, so just wait till I get home, and we will talk about this.

When we got home, I looked at the boy Barbie, and yes, it was broken.  And no, I could not fix it.  But I'm also not one to pass up a learning opportunity.

So Ping kept the broken Barbie and gave her sister G *her good* boy Barbie.  We figured out that it wasn't "fair" that Ping broke G's Boy Barbie, and yes, it was an accident... but there still had to be something to restore trust between the girls.

That night, they had a wonderful time together.  They played, did not fight for the remainder of the night and they even decided to sleep in the same bed together... they even made plans to have a Tea Party after school with each other the next day.

What could have turned into an absolute mess of an evening, turned out being one of the best ones of the week for the two girls.  Something bad happened, but both girls handled it so well that there was no lingering ill will, and they went to bed (together) happy.

... and all without Mom.  :-)

Oh, and I'm never one to pass up a learning moment, so with the broken Boy Barbie I had a nice long talk about how the "broken" Boy Barbie wasn't "broken" - that he was just missing part of his arm.  And that that was OK.  There are lots of boys and girls in the world who are missing parts of their arm, or a leg, etc.  I figured our next adoption might include a special need where part of a limb is missing... might as well start getting the kids used to the idea that a person who is "different" isn't broken... that they are just as important, valuable and loved as anyone else.

A Funny Thing Happened...

... while driving home from the grocery store on Sunday.

Colouring at one the FOI Party

Ping:  Daddy Daddy, how, um... how you say... car.  In french... no, chinese.  How you say car in chinese.
Me:  Car?  Car is che.
Ping:  Oh.  And how you say, how you say mmmmmmm JUMP!
Me:  Tiao.
Ping:  No, not french.  In CHIIIIIINA.
Me:  Yes, Tiao means jump in chinese.
Ping:  Okay.  And how you say book in china?
Me:  Shu.

And this went on for the 10 minute drive back home (thank goodness for Google Translator!).  Just word after word in Chinese.  I know that may not seem like much, but it is really the first time where she was intentionally asking about Chinese words.  Maybe the second time where she showed an interest in speaking Chinese (I think the 1st was when she tried to sing Happy Birfday - no wait, the 1st time was when she was swearing at me in Chinese, but I won't count that one).

I would like to think that with the wonderful weekend we had of Chinese New Years parties, with all the friends both Chinese, non-Chinese and adopted, that maybe she felt just a little bit better about her place in life.  That maybe she felt somehow "safer" in our family after seeing so many other children who where "China" with "you no China" parents.  Maybe all the fun and games, great food and laughter made her feel even a little proud to be Chinese.  To see her brothers and sister playing with all the other children, regardless of nationality, to see them playing her games, making her crafts, doing "China" things, maybe just maybe somewhere in that mess we call life, she found a little bit to be proud of, a family to feel safer in...

Ping:  Daddy, you so FUNNY when you try to speak China!  HAHAHAHAHahahahahahahahaaaaa!!!

... orrrr, maybe she just thinks I sound crazy, and likes to laugh at me.
She gets that from her mother you know.  :-)

When the Wifes away...

... we PARRRRRRRTAAAAAAAYYYYYY!

Oh yea, that's right.  I've still got dirty dishes sitting on the counter from Saturdays CNY Party, but thats OK.  Cuz we had a great time.  There were crafts for the kids, the house was decorated, good food, great friends, new friends, and even fireworks!  Thanks Theo for risking life and limp firing off the fireworks with me.  I won't tell you where I got them, cuz that might scare your parents.  ;-)

So, on Saturday we missed the Chinese School Party party cuz I work up sick... but we still had our party.  Then on Sunday, we had the FOI Party!

I'll add some photos here as they come in...

Day #2 Without the Wife

I would like to think that things have been going pretty well for the last 36 hours or so without the wife...

Everyone is so happy!  Except Ping, who decided to cry about having her Picture taken.

I know its still early, and there is a long way to go.  But we did get 2 of the children bathed between yesterday and today, K made his drama practice, I got a couple hours in at the office, the kids all made it to school on time, and ice skating (although D might have lost his Ice Skates on the way home!)...  I got them all fed (Marg sent the main dish, I added some garlic bread and a nice salad) and into bed with no problems.  Yes sir, the birds were singing, I was Super Dad, the world was right and my house of cards was coming along quite nicely!

Well... okay, thats the story in my head.

What really happened was pretty much what was listed above, but with more crying, yelling, screaming and spitting.

Ping woke up this morning and it was like me and her took a 6 month step backwards.  She fought me on everything!  Get dressed?  Nah-uh!  I don't think so!  Not without tantrum crying/screaming and laying prone on the ground saying "I can't do it", "I'm never right", and "You don't love me!"  Breakfast was another fight.

(Story told from Pings perspective ala 'The Champ')
So there I was minding my own business when I run into Adrian The Yeti Berzenji, and he says to me "Hey Champ, how about you come get some... oat... meal".  And I say, "Pardon?"  Again, the knucklehead says "Hey CHAMP, how about you come get some... oatmeal".  WELL!  I LOOSE IT!  I SNAP!  I head fake him with a spurtle and the chowder head falls for it!  A FLURRY OF punches to the solo-plexus and the Yeti goes down like a sack of 3 day old oats soaked in dirty bath water.  And I say "Hey Yeti, is that enough 'Come get some oatmeal' enough for ya?"  And ever since, I've been The Champ.
(End)

Now, I'm not doing anything differently than every other morning when I get the kids ready for school.  I'm the one who gets them dressed, and brush their teeth and stuff.  The Wife feeds 'em breakfast... but I go out with them and get 'em on the buses.  And what is normally a pleasant routine, turned into one big fight... well, a fight from her side.  I wasn't really fighting with her.  Just held my ground and expected her to get dressed and ready for school amidst the tears.

When Ping did get home from school, I called to check on how K was making out with her.  I quickly packed up my work, and headed home.  She was still in a bad mood.

By 6:30pm she was in bed going to sleep because she had started spitting in her sisters face.  Oh my gosh, you would think I was trying to kill her by putting her to bed early.  But through the tears, I noticed something.  A smile.  I don't think she wanted to smile.  But at the same time, I think she was happy to see that Daddy is not going to bend or break just because she throws a fit.  We have laid down our expectations as parents, and although there are times in wisdom and love where expectations may be changed, this was not the case today.  She needed (and I think wanted) to know that just because Mom was here, Daddy could (and would) still expect the same behavior from her that we always have, and that in return, Daddy will provide the same warm, safe, loving home even though Mommy may be gone.

So is there separation anxiety already setting in?  Maybe.  But it will be better tomorrow.

Today was a great reminder of just how far we have come in the last few months.  It is also a reminder that no matter how far we think we have come, there is farther yet to go.

But most importantly... I am reminded to be so very very very very thankful that Ping has stopped yelling at me in Mandarin every time we are alone, for as long as we are alone.

Daddy's cook'n!

Keeping in a long line of husbands and chefs in our family line, Daddy is taking care of super.

So far, it's been oatmeal, jelly fishes and Dairy Queen Dilly bars... Oh, and some pickles.

Luckly one of the comunial wives has taken pity on our children's cullinary plight has called and said she is bringing over diner.  

YAY me!  Like the jigilo frog I only have to provide food, there was never any clarification on HOW I had to provide the food.  :-)

Thanks Marg for the food!

-- Sent from my Palm Prē

Mr. Mom

Doom: Dude!
Me: Hey Doom. How'ya doing. Haven't seen you in a while. You doing well?
Doom: Yea... That's okay tho, I know you've been busy. Running around... thinking life is all great and stuff.
Me: Yeeeea. Its a nice feeling from time to time.
Doom: Oh good. Glad you are enjoying it.
Me: Yup.
Doom:  Didja give much thought about what you're gonna do this week?
Me:  What do you mean?
Doom:  Well, lets see... you've got your software delivery due this week at work.
Me:  Yup.  No problem.  Got it covered.
Doom:  Oh yea?  What about the side job you got going to help pay for the adoption?  I hear you are a little behind in delivering the goods.
Me:  Yea, I'm a little behind, but I'm catching up.  I've got a plan in place.
Doom:  Oh good.  I'd hate that you were feeling overwhelmed.  Hey, what about the other side job you got going for the social worker there?  You know, to help offset some more of the adoption fees.
Me:  Ahhhh, good.  I guess.  The laptop is in.  Got it configured... finally.  Just gotta drop it off, and do some data transfer... and... ugh... well, it's all good.  All good.
Doom:  Un-huh.  Kind of a tight balancing act you got going on.  Like a deck of cards ready to fall!
Me:  You mean a house of cards.  A deck of cards wouldn't really fall.
Doom:  Saaaaay, how about Chinese School on Saturday?
Me:  Well, Ping is falling behind a bit.  My fault really, no time to practice with her.  Oh, and THIS Saturday is a big party.  Oh, I should tell my co-worker about it, she dosn't really pay attention to Chinese School.
Doom:  And don't you have a party Saturday afternoon as well?
Me:  Yea, well, me and Roberta are hosting a big Chinese New Year Party for some adoptive families.
Doom:  Hmmmm... interesting.  And Sunday?
Me:  Ummm, Chinese Party with the Adoption Agency.
Doom:  What are we forgetting...
Me:  Ice skating for G and D this week at school, lots of little loose ends.  You know, clean the house for the parties, make the food, stuff like that.  But hey, thats gonna be handled by the wife mostly.
Doom:  Interesting.  MwhahahahahahahahahaAAaaaAAAHHHHH!!!
Me:  Dude, enough with the evil laugh.
Doom:  I know something you don't know.
Me:  Oh bring it on!  I could use a challenge.
*ring* *ring* *ring*
Wife:  Hey, uh, my Dad just died.

And just like that, I could watch all my brilliantly laid plans start to unravel.  Or, like the house of cards being blown over slowly, each wall falling to the ground in a whirl wind of uncertainty.

So this morning, during the biggest blizzard of the last 20 years, what was I doing?

Playing in the snow

I was fighting my way though the blowing snow, and sleet and cold to get my wife to her hair dressers so she could have her hair "done" (because the stress of the week has made it painful for her to blow dry her hair - no really, her shoulders are so tense she can't barely move)... all while we had about 3 hours to get the wife to the airport to try to catch a plane which hopefully hasn't been cancelled.

Getting hair done, in a blizzard, before the flight...

And yes, my wife's father has passed away, and yes, I'm sure that is very sad (I'm sure that will come up more in the next few blogs), but that is not really the point of this post.

This whole blog is nothing but a sad attempt at generating some sympathy (which I won't get from the "moms" out there) for my upcoming week.  I've got a few things on the go which I will now have to handle all without my lovely wife while she is out for a couple weeks.

I've got:

• major software delivery due this week for work
• the 'Brits flying in for work next-next week
• planning a trip to Amsterdam for work
• get the kids to school 
• get the day care kids to school
• get to work this week
• get home before the kids from school
• get D to karate
• goto Pings class and do a Chinese New Year presentation
• get Ping + G to Chinese School
• get the grocery shopping done for the next two weeks
• get the shopping done for the Chinese New Years Party we are hosting
• host the party (anyone coming to the party, don't you dare cancel on me now!  :-)  It will be great!)
• attend the FOI party
• many loads of laundry
• still fit in the Wednesday night Date Nights with the kids (yes, it was Pings turn today, and she would not be turned aside)

Anyway, today was the 1st day Roberta has been "gone-gone" in a long time... and it started off well enough. I was sticking to the daily routines.  Snacks for the kids at the normal snack time, outside play when outside play is supposed to happen...  slowly rebuilding my house of cards... when whoosh!

*ring* *ring* *ring*
Friend:  Hello.
Me:  Hey.  It's me.
Friend:  Hey, did the wife get a flight out?
Me:  Yea, she did.  Ummmm... I know that she has only been gone for about 2 hours, so it would be great if we didn't tell her that I had to call you already.
Friend:  What happened?
Me:  Can you put snow pants in the washer?  One of the kids just pee'd in thier snow pants.  They havn't pee'd themselves in like, 5 years.  But they decided to do it now.  Just now.  You know, now.  Once the wife left.
Friend:  I won't tell her.  Yes, you can put them in the washer.
Me:  Thanks.

The 1st day is winding down, kids are tucked in, asleep.  I'm still trying to figure out what is going to happen tomorrow.

Now, I'm going to go and try to re-assemble my house of cards, while my wife is sitting in a house very far away looking at a very different shattered house of cards which she will have to try to piece back together, and which somehow makes my deck of cards seem silly and unimportant.

Oh, the last two things she said to me were:

1. don't try to say anything to make me feel better, you're just gonna wind up making me mad cuz you will say something stupid
2. you better throw the best damned Chinese New Years Party while I'm gone!

Hey, I wonder if we can use this as a fund raiser?  You know, like, a betting thing.  We can have the Over/Under bets on how long it takes for me to have to call 911 or the Poisson Control Line with the wife gone.  All the proceeds can go to the Chip In fundraiser!  :-)