Thursday, January 28, 2010
Dream On
from: Mike
to: me
I read a few posts that Aerosmith are definitely looking for a new singer. Looks like Tyler finally lost his marbles.. Sorry Ade..
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from: me
to: Mike
Oh no! Its ALL good! This is my big break! :-) I'll just swoop in as the new Lead Singer and all is good! They have high speed internet in Hollywood right?
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Dreams, well, what are they? We all have 'em. I know I do... or did... or something.
And although I have come to terms with the fact that I probably will never be the lead singer for Aerosmith, there are some other dreams which I've been a little stubborn to let go of.
I've wanted a good wife, good family, good job, etc... I'm still waiting on the good wi... er, job.
Adoption was a big dream of ours, and one which we refused to let go of. There were many things which made it seem like that dream was "too big", or "too hard"... I'm pretty sure there is a verse in the Bible about all things being possible with "someone" helping out... hmmm... guess I won't argue with the Bible.
My question to myself upon hearing the news of Aeromsith, was (besides the obvious, "how do I get the lead singer role") thus: What are Pings Dreams.
Did she have a dream to be adopted?
And if so, are we the dream she was having?
A hairy Yeti from Northern Manitoba I'm guessing was not her 1st choice in her dream family.
Was there disappointment for her when she saw a "white family" come to adopt her?
Did she feel like "Great, 1.3 BILLION people in China, and NO-ONE wanted me... I got these yahoos... and a Yeti."
(In truth, I believe it was that God had to hide her beauty from 1.3 BILLION people so that she would be free for us...)
Dreams are funny, because, no matter how you plan them, sometimes God knows best, and our dreams may not be the same as his dreams for us. But one thing I've learned is that Gods Dreams are in the end, always better than our Dreams.
Sometimes we dream in spaces confined by our own understanding, or lack there of. Sometimes, we dream small dreams, when we should have BIG dreams. And other times we don't dream at all.
I'm not sure if I was the answer to my daughters dreams, but I know that I'm working hard to make sure that she knows that she was the answer to mine.
I figure God will work out the rest.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Daddys Shoes
Daughter #1: *giggle* I did! *giggle*
Me: What?! Why? I thought we stopped putting stuff in my shoes a long time ago?
Yes, a few months back... maybe even a couple of years back, the kids used to put stuff in my shoes, so every morning when I put them on, there would be SOMETHING in there. Of all the stuff I've had stuffed in my shoes for me to find in the morning, I've had:
- Lego Blocks
- Stuffed Animals
- Stickers
- Balls
- Toy Cars
- Barbie Dolls
- etc...
Its amazing what kids find to do, to make their parents laugh. And its amazing how the simplest most obscure and mundane tasks, can become some of the deepest most meaningful bonds between a parent and child.
D#1: Nope, its part of my chores!
Me: Part of your chores?
D#1: Un-huh! *applies cute face to Daddy*
Me: Your chores are picking up the toys, putting away the shoes, and hanging up the coats.
D#1: ... and putting stuff in your shoes!
Me: I see... good to know.
... fast forward many more "things in my shoes", as I'm getting ready for work one morning ...
Me: OW! Hey! Its another ... what is that? PLAY-DOUGH!?
D#1: *giggles*
Me: Did you put this in my shoe?
D#1: *points to Ping* Nope.
Me: Piiiiiing, did YOU put this in my shoe?
Ping: *giggles* Yes Daddy!
Me: Are you just saying Yes Daddy?
Ping: *laughs* Yes Daddy!
Son #2: Ping put that in your shoe Dad, I saw her.
Its also amazing how those same bonds between parent and child can be shared by all siblings. Here, Ping, is trying her best to fit in with the family. And like a GOOD big Sister, D#1 took it upon herself to TEACH Ping how to stuff Daddy's shoes with "Stuff".
And that is amazing!
Give D#1 full marks for sharing. D#1 had to go from no sister, and no competition for Mommy and Daddy, to instant competition and a sister who is still learning the basics of Sharing. Now D#1 started showing (and sharing) Ping something special, something that D#1 shared between her and her Daddy, and she gave that to Ping. So that BOTH of my Princesses could stuff things into my shoes.
... fast forward a little while more ... getting ready for Church yesterday...
Me: OKAY! WHO put stuff in my Shoes THIS time?!
D#1: It wasn't me! *points to Ping*
Me: Ping... did you put THIS in my shoe?! *pull out Mickey Mouse Playing Cards*
Ping: *giggles*
Me: Well? Ping?
D#1: (very serious and point of fact) Oh that. Oh no. That was me. *laughs*
I love the stuff crammed into my shoes every morning. I know that my girls work very very hard at stuffing some of those things waaaaay down in there. Like, the teddy bear stuffed all the way down into the toe of my boot... I sear, they probably had to use the plunger to get it down in there...
And I'm going to miss these sorts of things when they out-grow them. These are the little things that no-one else gets to have with our children. These are some of the things which make us a family. The little things that no one else ever gets to see or experience... but we get to treasure forever. And hopefully, one day, tell at their weddings to embarrass them.
I'm glad that Ping is doing stuff to fit into the family... but I donno... maybe they could do some stuff to their Mother for a change?
Naaaah, who am I kidding. I love it.
Although, they *could* lay off the cold, wet hands on my back in the morning to wake me up...
PS: I'll try to post some pictures later, I just don't have any on me right now.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
I Love You Daddy!
Now, granted, she hasn't entirely mastered the English Language, and granted, she might actually be telling me to "go away", but if you listen closely to the video below... and if you use your imagination, you can (almost) distinctly make out the words "I love You Daddy!"... again, it might be "Eye Blove Yonder Andy"... but I'm going with the 1st translation.
... and yet, it *could* still be Mandarin for something else... uh, like, oh never mind. Its I LOVE YOU DADDY!
Now, again, one might think that I'm thrilled to death about this video and the fact that my daughter is stating her unwavering love for me... but I would feel as if I were leading you along a falsehood should I choose not to reveal the following tidbits of information:
- She was infact talking to her MOTHER when she was professing her undying love
- When I DID enter the room to hear the wonderous news, she immediately shut up
- I still have not heard the above from her own two lips
- I have however heard it many times in the way she runs away from me screaming, curls in to the fetal position when I pick her up, and generally still yells 'BU YOW!' when I want a kiss. ;-)
- I DO feel it tho, when she rests in my arms and cuddles in, when she comes slowly to me after she gets hurt, or when she climbs on my back and laughs until she can't hold on anymore
Ping: Daddy, you can't MAKE me stop seeing Jed!
Me: Sure as heck I can!
Ping: Oh Daddy! I HATE you!
Me: What? Why? Trust me... you are better off with-out that red-neck hill-billy from Winchester!
Ping: DADDY! He is NOT a red-neck!
Me: Ah, but he IS from Winchester! Winchester!!! Where did I go wrong?!
Ping: You are so lame...
Me: You know, THIS is the reason I built the moat...
Ping: And bought the shut-gun... I know.
Me: I'm just trying to protect my little innocent Baby!
Ping: But Daddy, I don't NEED you to protect me!
Me: Yes. You do.
Ping: No... I don't!
Me: Look, we finally agree that you can date, and you bring home some rusted-out-Camero driving, gun toting, slick-backed-hair, ripped jeans wearing, transmission sitting in the bathtub hick named 'Jed' from Winchester home! If you wanted to earn our trust, you should have brought home some Toyota driving Dentist-wanna be named Winston... or something.
Ping: Didn't you and Mom teach me to be responsible? Grown up? To make good decision?
Me: No, I taught you that. You mother taught you many things... like, how to spend my money... or, how to get your way...
Ping: I know you love me...
Me: ... or how to turn a "quote" into a purchase...
Ping: ... but you have to learn to let go a little.
Me: ... or how to manipulate your future husband into getting you a drink of water every night after he is snugly tucked into bed, warm and toasty and almost asleep.
Ping: ... just a little.
Me: ... or how to ...
Ping: Dad, focus!
Me: Look, I know you are growing... you are what, 14 now? And you want to start making decisions for yourself...
Ping: 33 Dad. I'm 33.
Me: Right, and THAT'S why you are finally allowed to date!
Ping: I hate you.
Me: Oh but you didn't always!
Ping: I'm pretty sure I did.
Me: Oh no, look, I have proof on my Video Camera from when you were 4! Ping? Ping?! *siiiiigh*
Thursday, January 14, 2010
School Busses and Half Hugs
she wants to go on the bus.
So as our precious little daughter climbs onto the bus, and heads off
to school, I am once again amazed by her determination and bravery.
Shes got guts! Thats for sure.
I'm pretty sure if I had enough Baccon, I could wrap her in it and
take her Bear wrestling with me! :-)
But more importantly, maybe, or at least, equally important, is her
desire to start to feel dependant on on us.
Coming home from work, I can see that she is starting to want to be
loved. And not in the typical 'bratty little sister' way. Its not
just jelousey. It is an honest desire to be feel loved.
I can see it in her eyes, as she gets excited when I come into the
door, and start to run towards me asking for a "hug". Yet, when she
actually starts to enter my arms, she immediately coils inward and
guards herself. But it is a start... its more than a start.
Yes, now she will stay in my arms, and let me hug her. She may slump
over to the side, to make sure I can't hug her too tight, but she will
stay in my arms. Shes started putting one arm around me, and I'm sure
soon, I will get my 1st whole Hug.
And it isn't that I want a Hug just for a hugs sake. I will just feel
so happy for her when she can feel safe enough to love openly and feel
vunerable - but not scared or fearful.
Guess it WAS the Hair
I mean, why WOULDN'T some scared little girl from a foreign Country NOT want to cuddle up close with the guy on the left?
I DID shave the beard before heading to China.
What more can she expect from me?
After all, shes only left her home...
... her country...
... friends...
... school...
... bed...
... toys...
... everything.
She travels to the other side of the world to start a new life at 4 years old.
Learning a new language...
... new food...
... new country...
... its a cold country...
... new friends...
... new family...
... and me.
Of ALL the things that could have, should have, would have freaked her out...
From the absolute desolation of being the only person who speaks her language, to the knowledge that she may never see anything familiar again...
... she decides to get all tripped up on my HAIR?!
When my co-workers told me, "in China, bad men have long hair"... from the "get a hair cut comments" to the "she won't know that you look like Jesus"... I just assumed that they were trying to be funny.
But I guess not.
For last night I got my hair cut.
And for the 1st time, when Ping crawled into our bed at 3am she did not turn and go running from me as fast as her little legs could carry her.
No, last night, she crawled into bed, cuddled in close and fell asleep in my arms.
Now, do I miss my hair? Uh, yea. I would say that I was on the verge of tears after my hair cut, but I know no one would believe that considering how rough and rugged I am...
But my hair is a heckuva small price to pay for a night of cuddles.
... I mean, it could have been worse... like, maybe she didn't like my index finger... that would have sucked.
But hey, the hair will grow back... right? *siiiiigh*
But hey, I've had some GREAT support from friends:
- Laura C: Big changes... [...] You no longer look like a hooligan! :-)
- un-named: Now it makes your face look fat. You're gonna have to loose some weight.
- Francesc: [will it grow back?] every time takes longer :-)
- My Pastor: [grow back?]Yup...just on your back instead of your head :-)
There were others... but I'm gonna stop there... cuz I'm feeling SO good right now.
At least my daughter likes it...
Monday, January 11, 2010
1st Day Of School!
Its amazing how quickly they grow up... Yup, just 5 weeks ago, it seems like our newest little one was just placed into our loving arms, and now... all grown up and off to school!
Oh wait... it WAS just five weeks ago.
And yes, she is off to school already!
Ping was so very excited to goto school like her brothers and sister! However, the Ontario School Board was a little less excited. Yes, for this little bundle of joy and wonder from our family could infact be a hot bed for germs, disease and all around general Death to the poor innocent little Canadian Children.
Yes sir, while our bundle of joy was sitting on the front step, backpack in hand, coat on lap waiting to goto school, the school board was rejecting her admittance because they were not happy with her Vaccination shots.
Now, I don't want to turn this blog into a hot bed for Vaccination VS non-Vaccination type flame wars, but I would like to point out this little fact...
Fact: We were allowed to send our biological children to school without Vaccinations.
Fact: We were NOT allowed to send our adopted child to school without Vaccinations.
So after a couple more trips downtown to the family support center for the Ottawa/Carleton School Board, I finally had a fax in my hands, stating which Vacc's we still needed to get for Ping so she could attend school. Then it was a mad dash off to the doctors, all the while, our poor daughter trying to figure out why she isn't in school yet (the school had said she could start that week).
Thank God for co-workers who speak Mandarin and were willing to call home and talk to Ping and try to explain all of this.
Then, that Friday (this all started on Monday), Ping suited up and got to go to School to check out the class, meet the teacher and kids.
Well this morning, Monday, the 11th of January 2010 - Ping finally got to goto school! :-)
According to the teacher, there were a few tears when Ma ma left, but they subsided and she had a "good first day", she played House with some other children. All the children were "Hi Ping" and very curious about her.
For Pings part, she greeted everyone with her "Hey Baby!". :-) I guess she picked that up from me as I tend to call her Baby alot, and often greet her with Hey Baby. When one of my co-workers Weiquing was on the phone trying to describe the school routine, she often had to stifle a laugh as Ping kept referring to her as "hey baby".
So all in all, my wife was a wreck today. Not as bad as when some of our other children went to school for the 1st time. When our 1st born went to school, I don't think my wife slept for the month proceeding the big day, nor the following 3 months. :-)
By the 2nd child, it was maybe the 2 or 3 days before, and maybe a week after.
For the 3rd child, it was like, that morning she was worried, and maybe the next day.
But for Ping, its different.
Its different for many reasons... at first blush, you might assume it was just because it was child number 4 off to school, and quite frankly, she could come home with a "I Luv Mom" tattoo and some interesting body peircings and we probably would not notice...
... but thats not it.
Dont get me wrong, she may have a tattoo and I just havent found it yet.
But this feeling is more of a "considering what she has been through by the tender age of 4, I don't think that Juniour Kindergarden is gonna be that big a deal".
But at the end of the day, your baby is still leaving you, its still hard... my wife still didn't do nothing but cuddle with her the whole morning before she left, and I didn't do anything but cuddle with her when she came back.
Maybe this was a "nothing" event for her, but I think it was something for us... :-)
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Attachment and Ping
... co-workers and friends whom she has met... but the list goes on...
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Wednesday, January 6, 2010
More Random Cuteness
I've litterally worn out the picture button on my poor camera.
What I love about these pictures is that you can see how happy Ping
is, and thats normal. She is doing so wonderful!
We are so blessed. :-)
I just wanna Sleep...
1900h: Start the bedtime routine for the girls.
1903h: Clean up the toothpaste smeared all over the bathroom counter.
1905h: Start getting Dear Daughter#1 (DD1) into her jammies.
1906h: Start chasing DD1 since she thought it was hilarious to run around the house in her under pants.
1912h: Finish getting DD1 into her jammies.
1915h: Find Dear Daughter#2 (DD2) hiding under the dresser in the closet.
1920h: Still trying to coax her out from under the dresser.
1925h: Now trying to coax her out from under her bed.
1927h: Caught her by the foot, she got sloppy and a little too cocky.
1930h: Finish getting DD2 into her jammies.
1931h: Got a book to read.
1932h: Wrong book. Getting a new book.
1933h: Found a book DD1 likes.
1934h: Now looking for a book DD2 will stop crying over. She can't even understand it! Arrrgh!
1940h: Finished reading book #1. Ready to pray over them.
1941h: Starting 2nd book... still havn't prayed.
1945h: Escape thier bedtime routine after many many many many hugs and kisses (they still compete to get the "last hug" from Dad before bed).
1946h: Realise I forgot to pray over them, go back in.
1947h: Trying to coax DD2 out from under her bed.
1950h: Trying to coax DD1 out from under her bed.
1952h: Give up. They can figure it out.
1953h: Start tuning guitar #1, and talking to Son #2 (S2).
1955h: Crying from girls room... apparently, thier blankets are not on them. Well, of course not! They are still under the bed!
1956h: Re-tuck in the girls.
1957h: Start tuning guitar #2 with S2.
2000h: S2 starts his bedtime routine.
2005h: Start tuning the Violin.
2006h: Waiting for S2 to get his jammies on so I can read to him.
2010h: Still waiting...
2012h: Tuning a violin is very hard.
2015h: How long does it take to put on jammies?!
2025h: Finally! Go start reading to S2.
2045h: Pray, leave... start making lunches for tomorrows school.
2100h: Go pick up Son#1 (S1) from Youth Group.
2105h: Finish making lunches. (yes, the church IS that close)
2110h: Check the Sens game... ouch.
2115h: Go read to S1... oh, look, Wife beat me to it.
2130h: Tuck wife into bed.
2135h: Go downstairs, start to work...
2136h: Darn! I forgot, I reformatted my hard drive! I don't have MS Office. But I need to work on this Excel file.
2137h: Start downloading Open Office.
2140h: This is taking FOREVER! Oh well... turn on Canada VS US.
2230h: Ah, finished downloading! Start installing... oh wait... computer downloaded updates... has to reboot.
2232h: Oh look! Frenchy just jumped on STEAM...
2330h: Ah, good TF2 carnage online! I was on FIRE! Whooo! Oh snap, look at the time.
2331h: Restart Open Office install. Corrupted download?! AAARGH!
0030h: Finished downloading Open Office... again. Starting install.
0032h: YAY! Open the file now... start work.
0217h: Finished work. Yay. Off to bed.
0230h: Wake up wife. Wife angry. You no like wife when wife angry.
0300h: DD1 wakes up, crying, scared of the dinosaurs. Comes crawls into our bed.
0305h: Wife leaves our bed, crawls into DD1s bed.
0330h: DD2 wakes up, comes to our room. Crawls into bed with DD1 and Me. DD1 says the bed thing ever as DD2 wakes her up, she says "Daddy, you're lucky, now you have TWO Princesses in your bed!"
(I keep telling her that I'm the luckiest Daddy ever because now I have TWO Princesses since DD2 came home with us)
0400h: DD1 keeps getting woken up by DD2. I carry DD1 back to her room and put her back in her bed. Wife is in DD2s bed.
0430h: DD2 wakes up, very upset because Ma Ma is no where to be found... just the Yeti. I carry DD2 back to her room, put her in DD1s bed because Wife is in DD2s bed. I then carry DD1 BACK to our bed since DD2 is now in DD1s bed.
0444h: DD1 wakes me up, "Daddy, I can't sleep she says".
0700h: Up, and ready for work... oh snap! I have to get downtown for some forms for DD2!
0730h: Out the door, on the road... traffic... bah!
1024h: Arrive at work! Wow... do I ever feel like [BEEEEEEP].
1025h: Get coffee...
1026h: Get MORE coffee...
1027h: Just one more...
1028h: Yay... now I can start my day. I feel so rested and ready for whatever life may throw at me now!
:-)
Still, I wouldn't trade it for the world! Yes I'm tired. But its a good tired. Its a "gosh my kids are cute" kind of tired.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Christmas!
So I know this post is a little late, but better late than never eh.
Christmas Morning! Aaaah, the joys and wonders of Christmas... but lets back up to Christmas Eve first...
Me: Now kids, I know in the morning, you will be excited to wake up, and open all your gifts... but there is something very important to remember.
Kids: Whats that Daddy?
Me: If any of you wake me or your mother up before 6:30am, ALL the gifts are going back to the stores!
Kids: Awwwww, DAD!!! 6:30?!
Wife: Awwwww, you moron! 6:30! No waking mommy up before 9am!
Kids: WHAT?! 9AM!?
... Christmas morning... 6:34am...
Pre-Existing Cuteness (aka: Daughter #1): Daddy? Daddy? You awake Daddy?
Me: Yes, of course baby. I could hear you scratching at the door for the last 4 minutes.
Daughter #1: Can we open our presents now?
Me: If you can wake up the Mommy...
... some time (much) later...
Wife: Alright kids! Lets go open our presents!
Me: C'mon Ping! Come down stairs! Lets open some presents!
Ping: No.
Now, on the UP side... she has stopped saying "Bu YOW" everytime I ask her something... The DOWN side however is, I think it's because she learned "NO" in English.
Me: C'mon... its gonna be fun!
Ping: ... no.
Me: Look, Kole, Dawson and Gemma are all downstairs!
Ping: ... no.
Why is this Yeti still in my bedroom talking to me? And why won't he just leave me alone?
So I pick Ping up, tuck her under my arm and proceed to carry her downstairs. Amidst the flailing little arms and legs, protests in both English and Mandarin, we triumphantly enter the basement with the other children.
Oh, look! Shiny boxes wrapped in pretty stuff!
And the kicking, screaming, protesting ends.
Me: See, I think she is warming up to me.
Wife: I think she saw the presents.
Oh look, the Yeti is talking to me again. Really, why dosn't he just get a hair cut! Oh wait, he's giving me something now... a box.
Well thanks you silly Yeti. What am I going to do with a box?! It is pretty though. I think I'll just sit here and look at it.
Oh, whats this?! Why is he trying to take my pretty box away!?
Stupid Yeti!
Me: Ping, stop crying, look, you OPEN it! Kai! Kai!
Oh, look. You open it! The Yeti just could have said that. And whats inside... OH WOW! Toys! Awesome pretty things! This is GREAT! Ah well. I'm done here. I'm taking this toy and going back to my room.
Me: Oh Ping, wait, just wait... your sister is going to open a gift now.
Oooooh, look at that! Her stuff in pretty too! I'm just gonna hang out here and see what else comes up.
So each kid takes a turn opening a gift, and Ping watches and plays with the gift she has already opened.
Me: Here Ping, its your turn again...
Uuugh, the Yeti is talking to me again.
Ping: Nooooooo.
Me: Here, song gay ni... gay ni.
Oh, this is another gift for me? Theres more?! Wow! OH LOOK! Another pretty head band! This is GREAT! Oh I'm so happy! Back off Yeti! This is mine!
Another round of toys get opened by the other children...
Me: Here Ping... this is fo...
Ping rips it out of my hands and tears through the wrapping paper.
it was a Hanna Montana Christmas... yay?
Wife: I think she is figuring out how this works.
Me: Um yea...
Ping: Pings turns?!
Me: No, your sisters turn.
Ping: Noooo? Ping NOOOOO?
Her sister opens her gift.
Ping: My turn?!
Me: Not yet. Your brothers turn.
Her older brother opens his gift.
Ping: PING! TURN! YES!
Me: No, your other brothers turn now.
Stupid Yeti! Why can't I open I present! I mean, I see them all there under the tree!
Ping opens her gift, and by now, she has figured it all out. She starts crawling under the tree trying to dig out more presents... and the rest of the day was a blast!
busted trying to dig out more presents under the tree
After the presents, we went sledding...
me and the boys, the pictures are from a couple days after Christmas
when we brought the girls as well
Had some time with friends...
everyone got sucked into playing Twister with Daughter #1. When she opened Twister, her comment was "YAY!!! TWISTER!!! Daddy is going to LOOSE at this game!"
...and everything went pretty smooth for Pings first Christmas with us. :-)
Can't wait for the next one.