Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Wrapped in Bacon and Wrestling Bears

Sometimes you "get" something on a new level. It may be something that you had "gotten" before, but for some reason, it hits you anew, fresh, and deeper than in previous "gettings".

It could be a very profound "getted", like, while you are waiting for your child you "get" how much you love them, but when you hold them the first time, its a whole new level of "gettedness".

Other times, it may not be so profound.

This, is one of those "other" times.

Me: No yea, grew up in Flin Flon.
Friend: Really? Flin Flon. Wow. Sorry man.
Me: Don't be, it was awesome.
Friend: Really? Wasn't it cold? And boring...
Me: Nah man, really, awesome. I grew up in the woods, playing out side, dirt biking, canoeing, swimming, skiing, snowmobiling... And the town is actually quite pretty. Its all build on hills and rocks, and stuff.
Friend: But... its in Northern Manitoba!
Me: Well, yea. But its not bad. You know, once you get past the mosquitoes, black flies, and cold, and ... well... okay, maybe its not ideal, but darn it, I love it up North! It's like going home.

It was around this time that I realized, I really love it up North. I do. I don't know why.

Friend: Yea, so its cold. Buggy. Nothing to do... Boooorri...
Me: Hey! IT is NOT boring!
Friend: Oh right, canoeing. Like you couldn't do that anywhere else in Canada.
Me: We got other stuff.
Friend: Like what?
Me: We have the worlds Largest Trout Festival!
Friend: I'm sorry, was that the "only" Trout Festival?
Me: Hey! Don't be diss'n Teddy the Trout! Um, well, we also have bear wrestling?
Friend: Bear wrestling?
Me: Yea. We wrestle bears with our bare hands...
Friend: Un-huh... probably wrapped in bacon too.
Me: Darned right! We wrestle Bears Wrapped in Bacon! Because we are ...
Friend: Rough and Rugged... yea, you mentioned that a few times.

Not very profound at all really. Yet, I did "get" something during that exchange. It was the fact that I miss Flin Flon. I love Flin Flon! I enjoyed Flin Flon... okay, I tollerated Flin Flon? (No I really do love it up there!)

When I go back, is it the same Flin Flon I remember?

No. Not at all.

However, I have built up this "Flin Flon" in my head based on my ideals of a childhood spent there. And that is where the "got" came in.

I finally started to "get" the fact that Ping, will probably always miss China. I mean, I knew she would miss China, I read she would miss China, I was told she would miss China... but now... not I "got" it. As much as I love Ottawa, I still miss Flin Flon (Winnipeg, the city, not so much (miss the family there tho)). Was Flin Flon perfect? Heck no. Would I want to raise my children there? Probably not. But none of that dose anything to change the fact, that in my head, part of me longs for Flin Flon.

So no matter how much Ping may love Ottawa or Canada... she will probably always long for China. Thats something I need to remember, and not "un-get". Because when she is crying saying she wishes she was back in China, it has nothing to do with me... hopefully... but its all just a longing inside her to return to familiarity.

That alone was a pretty big "got it" type moment for me. Again, in my naivety I just assumed she would Love Canada. What was there to miss in China? Oh so much it turns out.

Then, the bigger "got". I just assumed she would love me (I love me, I think I'm pretty loveable, why wouldn't she love me?! What?! Someone dosn't love me?!)... but what about the people who cared for/loved her before me?

If I can have a longing for Flin Flon and Family... surely, Ping can/will have a longing to be back in China, with famaliar faces as well.

And what do I do with that? When she pushes back... wants to be let go... I guess just love her non-stop, and hope and pray that one day, she too will "get" the fact that I love her more than she knows.

Until she "gets" it... I hope at least she knows it...
Maybe after knowing it, she can believe it.
And after believing it, she can "get it".

Monday, August 24, 2009

Double Standards

Totally off topic... but not really... since nothing is ever really off topic for me.

But, my little niece (13) is visiting, well, actually, shes attending some intense volleyball camp 3 hours out of Ottawa... but again, that's besides the point.

When I dropped her off at camp, and hung around while getting her registered and such, I noticed that there was a rather large plethora of high-school aged girls running around in their swim suits (since they had to take a swimming test once they arrived) and my word! Those little 18 year old girls were running around sporting 6 packs and terribly fit physiques, not to mention towering height!

I am totally sending my boys to VolleyBall Camp when they hit their teen years! They may not play sports, but darn it, they will thank me later! They may have no interest what-so-ever in Volley Ball, but I know, when it is time to file thier old father away in a Nursing Home, they will pick a nursing home staffed by ex-Volley Ball Players... and I too will thank them. :-)

But I also realised that my daughters are NEVER EVER EVER going to go to VolleyBall Camp.

I think we all know that as parents we may have a tendency to enforce double standards, sometimes, for good reason too... as odd as that may sound. You may know that one child really struggles with something, which isn't a problem for a different child. To that end, one child may have more leeway in what they are allowed to do than their sibling. Double standards, right or wrong exist.

For example, my wife is a much better iron-er than I am. And I have come to terms with that. I no longer feel "less" of myself just because she can iron a poofy shirt in under 3 minutes, while I'm still trying to figure out where the water goes in the silly thing. And seriously, could they have made the iron any less user friendly if they tried?! You've got this gimpy little hole that you have to some how pour water into, but you can't fit the darned thing under your sink faucett so you resort to trying to fill it up in the bath tub, but then you get EVERYTHING wet including the power cord (and I'm no Electrical Engineer, but I'm pretty sure thats a bad thing), so then you have to dry it all off, and then finally go get setup for ironing. ARRRGH! I don't even like thinking about ironing... breath in... breath out... breath in... okay... I'm back with you. Point is, there is a double standard. My wife is just thrilled if I happen to even iron my own shirts and just manage not to burn the house down. However, my wife will re-iron her same shirt 42 different times just to get the very very very very... very... last wrinkle out of it. I'm walking about like a schlubb, and shes all pristine and beautiful. But thats a whole OTHER double standard... when women can walk about 1/2 bald, beer gut sticking out, stains all over thier shirt, and think "I've still got it!", then finally, there will be no more double standards in the world.

The question I'm posing to myself right now is this:
What double standards (if any) am I going to wind up imposing (sub-consciously?) on our adopted daughter?

I know she will enter school differently, be disciplined differently (remember, no spanking... not that we EVER spanked our other children... no no. Ha. That would have been bad.), etc.

Then of course, my next question is:
Will she be hurt by these double standards? Or will she be able to recgonize that we are trying to protect her, or raise her differently according to her own needs?

And finally, what will our other children think of these double standards? Are they going to resent the fact that Ping may be disciplined differently? Are they going to resent the immediate attention she gets (as we try to make up for lost time)? Are they going to resent that she may "get away" with more (at least from thier point of view) as she learns/adapts to our culture (good friends of ours pointed out that even "Please and Thank You" are doled out different in China than they are here)?

{this is about where my normal 30% thought process diminished to about 2% thought process... so if nothing makes sense after here, its not you, its me}

Hopfully we have raised our children well enough not to be resentful, instead to see that we have to parent each child differently because... well... (this may come as a shock to some of you) because no two children are the same. Not even biological siblings. In fact, there stands a good chance that Ping may have more in common with one of our other children, than our 1st and 2nd born have in common (our 1st and 2nd born are pretty much polar opposites of eachother).

Everyday is an adventure in how to reach your children, talk to your children, understand your children, and have them understand you. Riase them farily and with tonnes of love... ah, there is some place where no double standard should exist. Our children should be able to see, that no matter what, we love them all the same... and we love them the same because we could not possibly love them any more. Everyday your love for them grows, its crazy and amazing...

So what about those Double standards, well, I honestly hope we can raise our children without them. But if there ever comes a time where there are double standards, I hope they are for the right reason, and I hope the children can see that double standards are not there to hurt/hinder them, but to create a safe environment for them to grow and learn, be safe, and know above all, that they are loved.

Maybe, just maybe, I'm going to stop calling them "Double Standards", and just call them "boundaries." Because boundries are there to help you grow and learn, and again, above all, know that there is someone who loves you and wants to help keep you safe.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Welcome to Canada! Yes, it IS always this Cold. No, you can't go home.

So, I grew up in Northern (Central by Northern standards, but everyone else considers it "North") Manitoba in a small town called Flin Flon! :-) YAY Flin Flon!

(dog sled race, circa 1945 in Flin Flon)

It was a pretty awesome life. Growing up outdoors, boating, canoeing, skiing, sledding, skating, camping, wrestling bears wrapped in bacon. You get the idea.

I wonder, what will our new daughter think of Canada? I mean, we have:

(moose in a car)

(I donno what to even say about this... "dude, I TOLD you to check for the alarm!")

Now, our Ping is going to be coming from Southern China. Which, judging by the pictures, is warm... and sunny... and pretty... and warm... I know my wife has been wanting us to move someplace warmer for a long time now. And she was born and raised in Canada! How is our cute little precious snowflake Ping going to adjust!?

(found this on Google, its in the Canton province)

I mean, would YOU want to leave a place like that?

If Pings adjustment to our Canadian winters (and Ottawa is WAAAAY warmer than where I grew up, I mean, we moved TO Winnipeg FOR the warmer weather), is going to be anything like our friends from Kenya, Barbados, or Jamacia, then I fear Ping may take one step off the airplane at the Ottawa International Airport and go running back on screaming to go back to China! :-) My wife might just go with her as well.

(snow day in Montreal)

But hey, it is not all bad... I mean, we do have snowmen, and snow angels, Tim Hortons, Hockey, and in the summer, sometimes, if we are lucky, and its not raining, we do have some nice things to see and do. But at the end of it all, I'm damn proud to be Canadian, cold and all.

(kids at Niagra Falls, after their Maid of the Mist boat ride)

(me and the kids at Gatineau Park)

I just hope Ping is going to be okay with it as well... and not try to escape back to someplace warmer. :-) Now, my wife may try to escape someplace warmer...

... I think the only thing keeping her in Canada is the sad realization that if she moved to Caliafornia she would have to vacation in Canada (where it is cold, and that to her is just too depressing).

So there ya go!
Welcome to Canada kiddo!
Yes, it is cold.
No, you can not go home, because you are home.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

More Pictures (says the Wife)

(Pics: PRIDE Course, Family - 1 (Ping still missing))

You know, I was looking at our blog, and thought maybe I could make a suggestion?
Me: Can I stop you?
Wife: I couldn't help but notice that other blogs have pictures in them.
Me: Right, ours has some pictures.
Wife: Yea, but other blogs have like, lots of pictures!
Me: I'm going to guess that other blogs aren't being written on their lunch breaks far far away from all pictures of their family.
Wife: Well that's just poor planning on your part then.
Me: *siiiigh* Right, more pictures.
Wife: I'm not trying to tell you what to do.
Me: No no. Of course not.
Wife: Because I'm not a nagging wife.
Me: No, not at all.
Wife: I could be a nagging wife. Do you want me to be a nagging wife?
Me: Maybe you don't have to nag because I actually do stuff.
Wife: Like my bathroom which is still waiting to be re-done?
Me: Well, I can tell where this conversation is going. I'm just gonna go put more pictures on the blog. It's cheaper than re-doing the bathroom.
Wife: And we really have to finish off Pings room and our walk-in closet before Ping arrives!
Me: Right, because a walk-in closet is exactly what every child wants for their mother.
Wife: Did you say something?
Me: Oh no! I'm just posting pictures. Looooots of pictures.

Anyway, on that topic... I do hope the blog is working out well for everyone reading it. I mean, I enjoy blogging... which still surprises me.

And since my wife is making suggestions, is there anything else the blog is missing? Feel free to leave some constructive comments in the 'comments' section for any other ways the blog can be improved.

PS: Suggestions such as "stop blogging", or "get a new writer" are not really the ones I'm looking for. :-) However, comments like "boy you rock!", or "how did you get so rough and rugged!?" are always welcome. :-)

Monday, August 17, 2009

Wonderful Community

My wife and I were talking last night (normally an event I loose) about the Adoption Community. And I would have to say, that you all... are awesome! :-)

There are so many people who offer help, and support, and all that "good" kind of stuff, not the "ok" stuff. The "good" stuff.

And it is sometimes a little surprising. Normally, if you get around a group of emotionally charged people (and oh yes, adoptions are emotional (you know, just in case I hadn't pointed that out yet)) you get both extremes ... some people who are super great! And others who are... well... like Leafs Fan... er... not so great.

But so far, I'm not sure I've met a Leafs F... "not nice" person in the community.

I wonder why that is?

Is it the actual process which makes everyone feel a kinship with each other? I know the moment I find out that someone is adopting, it really feels like we should be friends... just because we have that one thing in common. Is it the monumental task of adoption which requires Herculiean strength and will, which makes us all stronger and brings us closer together... like a brother-hood of soldiers fighting the good fight for (and with) each other?

I could see it all now!

It would be like in all the typical guy movies:
  • Adopting Private Ryan (where we all fight to finish our adoption process), or
  • Rocky XVII: Rocky Adopts (where one of us adopts a little one, and the rest cheer them on as they strive for greatness), or
  • The Adoption Kid (where one little adopted child takes on the school bullies), or
  • Aliens VS Adoption (where Jet Li can kick some alien butt! Okay, not really adoption related, but c'mon! Jet Li versus some ALIENS?! How AWESOME would THAT be?!), or
  • The Godfather (where an adoption agency gives you a referral you can't refuse), or
  • Adopt Hard (where some plucky New York Cop played by Bruce Willis decides to adopt), or
  • The Dirty Dozen (where a family adopts 12 children), or
... I could go on for a while here, but I'll stop.

For the ladies, I think it might be more like:
  • Sleepless in Seattle (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA), or
  • Thelma and Louise (where two friends jump in an old broken down convertable and try to drive to China to get their newly adopted children)
  • French Kiss (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA (for a french adoption)), or
  • Bridget Jones Diary (where a single woman tries to adopt, but keeps complaining that only the pretty mom's get the children)
  • You've Got Mail (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA (via email)), or
  • Addicted to Love (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA), or
  • When Harry Met Sally (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA), or
  • really... ANY movie with Meg Ryan...

The point is, I think we are all walking a long road together, and I think/hope that the whole process brings out the best in us.

We know someone traveling to our orphanage in a couple of weeks to adopt their little one... and sure enough, the family as said they will try to find our little Ping and play with her, and get some pictures of her... and how wonderful is that?

Already, there are people who not only care about us and what we are going through, but they also care about our daughter before we even have her here at home.

That to me, is a "God thing".

Maybe this is just one more lesson for me to learn during this whole process. A process where lessons like,
I can not have all the answers myself,
I can not make things happens the way I want them do,
I can not fix every thing,
I do not have ultimate control,
and others, are learned every day.

But there are other lessons which I've been lucky enough to learn thought this as well. Lessons like,
I can trust that others can take care of things,
I can not rush Gods timing,
There are others who are going through the same things,
There are those I can help/encourage/support,
I do not need to control everything,
and other such lessons.

So to those adopting, and to those supporting those who are adopting... good on you. Continue to encourage those who need encouraging,
lift up those who need lifting,
walk with those who need someone to walk with,
and together, we will triumph, and like those who went before us, bring more love, life and laughter to our family simply by adding TO our family.

Friday, August 14, 2009

I feel Sorry for the Beautiful People

NOTE: If you do have a child who has any physical ailments, please don't take this post the wrong way. My wife and I are open to adopt many many different physical issues, and for myself, I really struggled to come to terms with some of those different choices... missing digits, missing limbs, blindness, etc. And it was during this period of struggle that I really re-defined how I evaluate beauty. Right or wrong, I (attempt) to use humor to convey some of the new thought processes... hopefully this helps people re-evaluate how we see people who "deviate from the normal".

Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder, yet Love is Blind... so where does that leave us?

I feel sorry for the beautiful people. And I'll tell you why... because they are all messed up, they just don't realize it.

This ties in loosely with the whole 'Waiting Child' topic a bit ago. What do you do with your child who may have a cleft lip? Or who may walk with a limp because of clubbed feet? Or anything else like that. Some times, maybe we worry that we would have a hard(er) time to love people who are not "perfect" (we are all perfect, right? Goodness knows, we all try to convince each other that we are).

On my previous "venting of my spleen" on this topic, it dawned on me that we will love our children, not because they are perfect, but simply because they are our children.

Deep and noble, thought I.

But this morning, it dawned on me, that I already am able to love those who may have existing physical ailments... In fact, happily, we all do this everyday!

I'll unpack this in a little more detail quickly... Firstly, start by thinking of someone who you find just strikingly beautiful! I don't care who it is, who ever you find absolutely stunning... your wife may care who that is... but I don't ( I'm not going to judge you). Now, you have that person firmly in your mind?

Quick, what is it that makes them beautiful!

Was it something like: pretty eyes, beautiful smile, great legs... lots of money?

Now, ask yourself, why do these people's features standout? They stand out and are noticed because their physical appearances "deviates from the normal" so drastically, that you can't help but notice them walking down the street!

So just like a child with a cleft lip may stand out because their smile "deviates from the normal", the same rules and logic can be applied to people like me, or you know, Angelina Jolie... we simply "deviate from the normal".

They (me) just happen to have deviations which we, as society, seem to favor. Big eyes, long legs, tiny little waists... what have you (in my case, a manly rough and ruggedness which can't be beat).

That makes me really sad... yet happy at the same time.

Sad that we judge so heavily on the physical appearance, yet miss all the cliches about beauty being on the inside...
... and yet happy, because if I can find Angelina Jolie beautiful (as far as she deviates from the norm), then I can find anyone beautiful!

So the next time you see some "beautiful" person walking down the street, I hope your heart breaks for them... they don't even know how messed up they are...

And if you see someone else who deviates from the norm, well, maybe we should tell them how beautiful they really are...

... unless they are a stranger,
... and you don't know them,
... then you might get arrested,
... and that would be bad.

And if you happen to have someone in your life who deviates from the normal, then how blessed are you to have such a beautiful person in your life!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Vent Your Spleen...

No, I didn't really know what that meant either. Luckily enough, I work with an Englishmen who was kind enough to explain what "venting your spleen" means:
"If you vent your spleen, you express your anger."
Alternatively, you rant or let off steam.

So naturally, I had to share that with you all. Why? What has venting your spleen have to do with adoption?

More than one might assume at first.

... thinking ... thinking ...

Okay... you now what, nothing. I got nothing. It has nothing to do with adoption. I just really wanted to share that new phrase with you all.

So go on! Vent your spleen! It's not good to keep all that spleenliness bottled up inside.

And you know what, there may be times we as parents need to vent our spleens. For instance, your lovely child decides to do something that they KNOW is wrong... times like:
  • colouring on the walls
  • smearing poo on the walls
  • breaking dishes cuz they liked the sound it made
  • trying to bath the cat in the toilet
  • trying to bath their little sister in the toilet
  • hiding your car keys, then forgetting where they hid them (normally when you are running late for work)
  • hiding sharp pointy toys in your shoes
  • etc... etc... etc...

And there may be times when as an adoptive waiting parent, you may want to vent... times like:
  • the government loosing your paper work
  • the mail loosing your documents
  • passport being rejected 3 times for non-issues
  • waiting... just... waiting...
  • etc...

And we need a safe place to vent our spleens! So I'm thinking of starting another blog called: ventyourspleen.ca just for us all to vent...

But then there is the other side of the spleen... times like:
  • when your finally get your referral
  • when you 1st see your child!
  • the 1st time your child says your name
  • every time your child holds your hand, hugs you, gives you kisses, or says "I love you"
  • every time your child calls out "Daddy! Daddy! Look at me!"
  • when they curl up in your arms and fall asleep
  • the 1st time they learn to ride a bike...
  • swing a bat...
  • catch a frisbee...
  • swim...
  • the 1st time you get to buy a life jacket beacuse apparently swimming dosn't come naturally to all
  • go to school (yikes!)
  • ... date, grow up, get married, have grand kids! (wait, I'm getting ahead of myself)
  • etc... etc... etc...
SO I guess venting your spleen might have a time and place... (I still think ventyourspleen.ca is a brilliant idea) But really, the important thing, is the "other side of the spleen".

And I love the other side of the spleen! It makes the rest of the spleen all worth while. :-)

Monday, August 10, 2009

The Hardest Thing...

The Hardest Thing...

Now, I'm not sure that I've ever REALLY done anything the easy way.

  • Got married, far too young.
  • Had children, far too young.
  • Went back to finish school with a wife and child, mortgage and car loan...
  • Did I mention I was married?
  • Worked 3 part time jobs to pay for the said wife (her bed fetish), car loan, mortgage, and child (while in school).
  • Moved thousands of miles away from family.
  • Got a job in software even though my education was in hardware.
  • Had a daughter.
  • Already am out numbered by children VS adults in our house.
  • Did I mention I was married?

So yea, I'm not really sure that I've ever really done things the "easy way"... I think the easy way might be boring. :-)

Oh, for example, after we got married, we bought the one bedroom condo, the two door car, and then decided to wait 5 years to have children.
Wouldn't ya know it, 2 weeks later, we were expecting our 1st child.

Huh. Typical. Such is my life. And I love it! :-)

What has that in relation to adoption?

  • Well, here we finally have all the time in the world to prepare for it!
  • We had courses!
  • We had Social Workers to help us thought stuff.
  • We had professional adoption agencies to calm us.
This should be easy!

... right? Anyone? *siiigh*

How hard could it be?
Fill out some forms... wait for a child... wait some more... and more...
and ... more...
... and more...
... and darn it!

Waiting is the hardest thing!

Forget the paper work.
Forget the interviews.
Forget the social workers, PRIDE course, screening process.
Forget the 35 Body Mass Index (arrrgh!).
Forget all the doubt and self worry about being a good parent.
Forget all the fears about Attachment issues.
Forget all that.

Lets just work on waiting.

And that today... that is the hardest thing.

Tomorrow? Who knows. Maybe I'll be lucky and my wife will buy a new bed and distract my thoughts for a bit. :-)

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

I'm an Uncle, again...

Sunday morning, we got a phone call ... my little Sister was in labour!

YAY!  So exciting.

I already have a couple of nieces who are amazing, however, because we lived thousands of kilometers away, I never really got to see them when they were baby-babies.  This surprisingly, made me somewhat sad...

Luckily, I have a tremendous wife!

She got on the computer that same day, found me a flight heading to Winnipeg within 18 hours of finding out that my sister was in labour, and here I am.

I was actually able to make it in time for the birth... truth be told... I probably could have driven here... by camel... and a slow camel at that, one which was missing a leg... or two... and still made it in time.  My little sister had 40+ hours of labour!  (and some say adopting is crazy and hard!)  Ouch.

And again, so many things run though your mind at a time like this.
Here before me, the miracle of birth!
My new niece was entering the world!
A world full of joy and wonder and merriment!
I knew my sister and her husband were excited and so looking forward to this.
What a wonderful birth story.

But really, I think the most profound thought was this:
Holy crap, am I ever LUCKY I'm a guy!

I guess really all birth stories are amazing.  Each for their own reasons.

And it is incredible to watch my sister go though all that labour, and yet some how, at different times, seem to think that she may doing something "wrong", or she was apologizing for something silly (like being tired), etc.
What apologies should she have?!  None.  She had a baby!  (thats a fair bit more than I've done in the last 40-some odd hours... or years...)  
That is the amazing "thing".
Its not the 28 hours without drugs... thats maybe crazy... I'm not sure... 28 hours of back labour!  Why?!
Its not this competition that some mothers seem to wear as a bragging right...

The amazing thing, is that a few hours ago... there was one less person in this room.
Now... there is another person (who also has Lans Nose).

Well, not THIS room... room.  No I'm at my parents.   I don't think blogging while my sister is busy pushing out a 9lb 3oz baby is proper etiquette.  And as wonderful and gracious as my sister is, I'm afraid she may have shoved my keyboard somewhere unpleasant.

Anyway, I'm even distracting myself now... where was I?

Right, the amazing thing was that, their family of 2 is now a family of 3.

And that is the same amazing thing about adoption... our family of N will now be N+1.

And how wonderful, exciting, amazing and SCARY is that!

Oh yes, I'm sure my sister and her husband are all of those emotions, including scared.
Oddly enough, the same way I feel about adoption... wonderful, excited and scared.

I know my sister is going to worry about her new daughter, just as I worry about mine.
She will have the same hopes and dreams for her beautiful little girls, just I will dream for mine.
She will hold her, cuddle her, hug her, and cry over her... just as I will mine.
She will sit up at night, wondering "is she alright?", just as I will mine.
She will crawl into her new babies room, and stand there... just watching her breath... as I will mine.
She will laugh with her, dance with her, sing with her, hold her hand when she is scared... just I will mine.
She will pass her new daughter to her father after she has filled her diaper for the 42nd time today, just as my wife will pass our daughter to ME...  (well, Pings out of diapers, so hopefully not, but you know what I mean)

I guess, all this could by summed up in this:
Maybe in the end, it helped remind me, adoption, isn't so different after all.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Why Do I Even Try? :-)

Wife: Where do you think this picture should go? Above the couch, or in the hall?
Me: Couch.
Wife: Alright, I'll put it in the hall then.

Wife: What should I wear, the green dress? Or the blouse?
Me: Dress.
Wife: Okay, I'll go with the blouse.

Wife: Do you want steak of vegiterian lasagna for super?
Me: (I've got this figured out by now) The vegiterian stuff.
Wife: Me TOO! Great!

Wife: New Stereo, or another new bed?
Me: Stereo!
Wife: How could you say that! We need a new bed!
Me: We've had 3 new beds already! I still dont have a stereo!
Wife: Bed.

Wife: Do you want to paint the closet today?
Me: No, I would rather work on my blog.
Wife: I'll go get you your painting stuff.

I could go on all day with these thins... but the basic rule I've figured out over the past 15 or so years, is that my opinion dosn't matter much. I think my opinion sits somewhere between that of a rock, and the cats, in terms of importance... and that wouldn't even be a smart rock! More like, and unintelligent rock...

Point is, we were tyring to decide on a 'Canadian' name for Ping... interestingly enough, one of my co-workers name is Ping. And although it is beautiful, I'm still afraid of the play ground... Ping... Pong... Ping... Pong... Kids.

I had recently put up the VOTE section for possible names.
The top three names were:

  1. Kaida - which I LOVED... but didn't expect to actually use... it is an Asian name as well. So why go from one Asian name, to another? So scratch Kaida off the list... only got 3 votes anyway, and I think 2 were mine. :-)
  2. Jade - again, a name I proposed and do really like... but just wasn't sure about.
  3. Ava - a play off a family-esque name (we have a cousin Eva) which works well with our last name, a good choice I thought.

Everyone voted.
And my Ava name won!

So... to that end, anyone want to venture a guess as to WHICH name my lovely wife has decided we will use for our new daughter?

... I'll leave you hanging in suspense... although, I'm pretty sure you can figure it out. :-)

Care Package #2 en-Route (via Red Thread)

I must admit that I was a little worried about sending a care package to our new daughter via Ann at The Read Thread.

But I must say, I am terribly happy with how everything went!

Not only did Ann get all the correct information about Ping from the orphanage, but she got us photos of her!

And then, she actually sent us photos of what she picked out for Ping!

So very thoughtful and quick!

Anyway, here is a picture of the package Ann (The Red Thread) put together for us.

PS: No, I'm not being paid to promote The Red Thread, I'm just very impressed by them. :-)