Monday, January 12, 2015

The Hardest Thing

I guess it's been about... oh, I donno, 2 years since I've blogged... so I figured I should start again.  So here is the thing... life's been pretty hard lately.  I mean, the two adoptions, leaving my job, moving the family to China and starting to server at a foster home to help care for special needs children...

But this post... this post I would like to talk about "the hardest thing".  I mean, the absolute hardest thing I've had to deal with.

It's not the language,  Chinese has been fun to learn.
It's not the intestine on a stick for diner.
It's not the family of 7 living in a small(ish) Chinese apartment.
It's not the "caterpillars" the wife ate.
It's not even missing my beloved Tim Hortons coffee.

We've been surrounded by great friends...
The children are doing great and growing...

It's not hard to take care of these cutnesses!  Photo from New Day South Facebook page.
No no... the worst, most very hardest thing so far... is the fact that I've run out of moral high ground to tell my children what to do!

What am I going to say when they are making bad life choices?!

"Son, stay in school... because one day, you're going to want a good paying job... that... you can... quit... and live off the charity of others... while living in a foreign country".

Or, "Son, you can't just pick up and move your family to a foreign country where you can't speak the lanaguage and don't know anyone!  That's just poor decision making..."

I mean, I'd already lost the whole "You're too young to get married" and the "You're too young to have children" arguments.  My girls love reminding me that we were 19 and 20 when we got married, and they don't understand why they have to wait until they are 33 before they can start to date...

But I'm outta any sage advice!  I'm an unemployed father of 5 living in a foreign country where we can't even communicate with people!  I'm a modern day Gypsy!  Hopefully, with better hygene... but that's debatable.

It's like, go get a real job... But Dad, you don't have a job.
Don't get married so young!  But you and Mom did.
Don't eat the yellow snow!  Ok... that I can still use.

What do I have left as a father to pass onto my children?!  Other than, "don't do what I did."  I have no wisdom to pass onto my children...

... except maybe... love, even when it doesn't make sense.
Serve, even when it isn't convient.
Money can't buy happiness, but happiness may cost you much.
The world may call you crazy, and they maybe right... but I'd rather be crazy doing something beautiful.

I love this quote from Mother Teressa:
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.
- Mother Teressa

In the end, I may not have the best advice to pass onto my children... but I hope they see a life dependant on God, full of Love and a willingness to serve others...

... and I hope they remember that... when I'm old... and broke... and need a place to live.