Monday, October 24, 2011

I Still Got This...

I should really know by now.  I mean, you go out, you post something like this, feeling all "Gods in Control" ... and then you get a chance to back up your words, with action.  I mean, don't get me wrong!  Oh no, I LOVE the opportunity to grow, and to make sure that what I say, I live out and believe.

... late Friday night...
Wife:  ... okay, thanks.  Good bye.
Me:  Was that the adoption agency?
Wife:  Yea.  They said last month, Lukai had to go to the hospital.
Me:  What?  Why?
Wife:  Ummm, I don't know.  They said, something about a 2nd Special Need which was previously not diagnosised.  They are sending us an email about it now.
Me:  Okay, hold on, let me check the email.
*BING!  You've got mail!*
Wife:  It's all in Chinese!  *grabs the phone*
Me:  I'll start translating it.
Wife:  Hey, the email is all in Chinese.
Adoption Agency:  I know, we're trying to find our translator.  She is not in.
Wife:  Okay, thanks.  Bye.
Me:  Why do they need a translator?  Our adoption agency is Chinese!
Wife:  It's all medical terms.  They need the medical terms translated.
Me:  It says he was diagnoised with Vitiligo.
Wife:  Isn't that the same thing Micheal Jackson had?
Me:  It is a depigmentation of the skin...
Wife:  Oh, good.  So it's only cosmetic.
Me: ... which is caused by thyroid conditions...
Wife:  Oh, well, you can get medical help for that.
Me: ... or, auto immune deficiencies...
Wife:  Oh.
Me:  Or, other reasons.  And apparently, it has spread since August from a "soya bean sized spot", to "the rest of his body".  Now that is a chinese to english translation, by me.  So... take it for what it is worth.

A picture of vitiligo on someones hands, from:
What followed that phone conversation has been about 48 hours so far of an emotional roller coaster ride - having a sick child is one thing, having a sick child on the other side of the world is a whole different thing.

But even during this emotional roller coaster ride, there was one constant.  Well, maybe two.
Number 1)  God still "has this"
Number 2)  We are still adopting Lukai.

An auto immune problem, or a thyroid condition, or even cancer (oh yes, right, vitiligo is often a missdiagnoises for a certain form of leukemia) can strike at any time.  Is our love for Lukai based upon his health status?  No.  If one of our other children all of a sudden were struck with cancer, or a thyroid problem, would we stop loving them?  Of course not.

Lukai is our son - and my wife said it best, "Us NOT adopting Lukai isn't even on the table.  It isn't even an option."

See, when our Adoption Agency phoned us, we were not so much worried about Lukais physical looks, his skin condition, or even cancer.  We can deal with that once he is here with us.  I think they (or maybe China) was thinking we would want to back out of the adoption.  What we are worried about is IF China (or the Ontario government, or anyone else) is going to "cancel" the adoption.  See, there was a different little boy we tried to adopt - had his referral and were moving forward with, when China pulled the child from the adoption process.  Someone somewhere had decided that that little boy was not for us and our family.

So are we worried about the vitiligo?  Of course.  Depending on how bad it is, this could be a big deal for Lukai to have to work though.  Are we worried that it might be cancer or something serious?  Of course.   It would be foolish to ignore any diagnosis of a medical condition.  Are we worried that someone, somewhere might try to stop the adoption?  Absolutely.

But see #1 above.

We loved Lukai yesterday, when he didn't have vitiligo, and we love Lukai today, even with Vitiligo.

So what do we need?  Prayer.  Prayer for us, prayer for Lukai, and prayer for all the directors, social workers, and government officials involved not to panic and try to stop the adoption.  What does Lukai need?  Part of me wants to scream "US!  He needs a home!  Someone to take care of him.", but he has a foster family, and hopefully he is being well cared for.  God knows what he needs - and God will meet those needs, either through us, or through someone else.

All we can do, is hold on, and push through to bring Lukai home... with or without Vitiligo.

Now... if you don't mind... I'm in the middle of a conversation with God, and I'm trying to explain to him what "I got this" means.  I think he has a very different interpretation of this than I do... I suppose that is a good thing.


  1. Praying for your family. In fact I thought about and prayed for your family a lot this I know more clearly how to pray.

  2. We got a disturbing update right before we traveled to adopt Shu. Even while we were there, we were asked several times if we still planned to adopt him. I think they really expected we might see him and change our minds. It was a challenging time for us, but God was (and is) faithful. I will be praying for you!

  3. I will be praying for you. Are you able to request some updated photos? Maybe contact Angela or Anne to request some ASAP? It might just help you understand a little more during these next few weeks until you have him in your arms.

  4. Just got photos ... like RIGHT now. We're still pouring over them. They were just taken (by the date from the camera in the photo).

  5. You know that you have our prayers! (even more than usual now)

  6. God is bigger than vitiligo, praying, now cough up these new pics already! Loved getting updates when we were waiting....I practally wnet threw them with a magnifying glass!! As Im sure Roberta is doing right now ;O)

  7. Ah, well, unfortunately these are not happy happy fun time pictures. :-) They are photos of the affected area. So I doubt I'll be posting them. Sorry.

  8. I am praying as well. That God's will will be done in this situation... hopefully that means he is coming home and nobody will try to stop him! This journey is never easy... is it???

  9. lies in the netherlandsOctober 25, 2011 at 11:16 AM

    I am not sure if I believe in God, but I do believe in the power of prayer (I am weird like that). I believe that if we try our best and work towards the good, somehow that will shine back on us and our loved ones. I believe that things happen for a reason. I believe in gut feeling and trusting your heart. I believe that what goes around comes around. I also believe that coincidence is no coincidence. Is that God? I don´t know. But what I do know is that I hold you all in my thoughts and pray that your wife will hold Lukai in her arms soon and I pray Lukai will understand that his life might be turned upside down, there is a loving family waiting for him and to take care of them as best as they can.

  10. Oh my, we are praying so much for you here in Michigan. God DOES have this and I know he brought you to Lukai for a reason. Please feel all of your adoption communities arms as we wrap you in prayer!!

  11. Adrian and family, I know this may seem awkward of a reply but I love this post. Why? Because of what you say.

    "Us not adopting Lukai is not even on the table."

    AMEN! Done. No MATTER what. PRAYING!

    lies, God just is! And there is NO POWER in prayer without GOD! Praying for you to BELIEVE in Him and HIS POWER!!!

  12. Oh, Adrian - worry doesn't begin to encompass the feelings surrounding something like this. Prayers that everything surrounding the adoption continues to go smoothly - the fact that they are sharing the news with you and didn't just suddenly halt the adoption is encouraging. I have to believe that your son will come home, and soon.

  13. I just wanted you and Roberta to know that I'm still praying and BELIEVING that this adoption will go through without anymore hiccups! Lukai is YOURS!

  14. Hi
    My name is Jenna and I came across your site. Lukai is an amazing, courageous, strong and determined fighter. He is a brave warrior, smilen champ and an inspirational hero. You are going to be wonderful, amazing, loving and caring parents to Lukai. You are blessed and lucky to have an amazing son like Lukai. I was born with a rare life threatening disease, and developmental delays. I love it when people sign my guestbook.

  15. My sister (and two of my friends) have vitligo.

    They're all perfectly healthy, and are actually all runners (go figure). My sister's was (most likely) caused by an autoimmune problem, and the only problem for all three of them is that the lightened spots are sensitive to the sun, so they have to wear extra sunscreen there.

    Prayers for your family and Lukai! I'll be sending a money order (I am Melinda :D) sometimes soon, I'm working with my high school's student council to get them to donate some of their proceeds and stuff to the fund.