Wife: Ping wants to play soccer this year.
Me: Awesome. Sign her up!
Wife: I already did.
Me: Awesome. Thanks.
Wife: They need coaches though.
Me: OH! Right! Yes... well, I'll coach!
Wife: Yea, thats a good idea. Ping might have trouble learning soccer and stuff. It would be best if you are there.
Me: Right, just call me "Coach".
Ping is playing soccer this year, and boy, is it fun! Coaching the Under 5 team is great, but, coaching Ping... well, that makes it interesting!
Ping: Ping go soccer?
Me: Yup. Ping is going to soccer.
Ping: And Ping have laoshi (teacher) soccer?
Me: Yup, Daddy will be your laoshi.
Ping: No, Mrs. K laoshi.
Me: Mrs. K is your school laoshi. Daddy is going to be your soccer laoshi, your Coach!
Ping: mmmm... no.
Ping: Ping say "no daddy laoshi". Ping laoshi Mrs. K.
Me: Alright, well... lets wait and see what happens.
We get to the soccer field, and amidst the confusion and chaos, we find our soccer team, and slowly get everything organized...
Me: Alright guys, I'm your coach! You can call me, Coach!
Me: And are we all here to play SOCCER!
Ping: No laoshi!
Me: And are we going to have FUN?!
Ping: Ping said "no Daddy, no laoshi!" You my Daddy. No Coach!
Me: Yes Ping, I am your Daddy. But I'm also the coach.
Ping: mmmmmm... I don't know...
I just LOVE how matter of fact Ping is in her delivery... just this simple, "but I said No. What don't you understand?".
The practice starts, and I get the kids up and stretching and running and playing...
... and finally, about 1/2 way though the practice Ping started accepting the fact that I was the coach...
Ping: Daddy! Give me hug!
Me: Huh? Hug? Now? No, I can't hug you now. We are playing soccer! Go get the ball!
Ping: But, but, Ping said "yes hug!"
Me: Ok, just a little hug.
Ping: Thank you Daddy!
Me: ... hey, what are you doing? Go get the ball!
Random Kid: I want a hug!
Me: What? No! Go get the ball!
I guess this is all good. Ping is doing well. Shes running, chasing the ball, carrying the ball (put the ball down baby! No hands!), kicking the ball... kicking the other kids... yelling at the other kids... oh...
Me: Ping, here, let go of the ball.
Ping: My ball!
Me: No, it is not your ball. Everyone is trying to get the ball.
Ping: But Ping said "NO". My ball! I no share.
Me: Yes baby, you have to share the ball. Everyone is playing with the ball!
Ping: But I no want to share! I said, "No touch my ball! Ping no Share!" And they KICK my ball! But I said "NO!"
Me: That is how we play soccer though! Everyone tries to kick the ball.
Ping: But I said NO. And I get MAD. I get so mad.
Ping wound up crying, and sitting the rest of the game out... she really did not want to share her ball.
The 2nd week went better. She only cried through the 2nd half of the game.
The 3rd week, well, that was great. She was so proud! "Daddy, I NO cry! They touch my ball, and I said NO, but I no cry!".
The 4th week went really well, where she finally understood that everyone tries to get the ball... and that is OK.
It is SO cute though to see her out there playing with the other kids and trying to get the ball...
... even if she sometimes still gets mad at them for taking her ball. :-)