My wife and I were talking last night (normally an event I loose) about the Adoption Community. And I would have to say, that you all... are awesome! :-)
There are so many people who offer help, and support, and all that "good" kind of stuff, not the "ok" stuff. The "good" stuff.
And it is sometimes a little surprising. Normally, if you get around a group of emotionally charged people (and oh yes, adoptions are emotional (you know, just in case I hadn't pointed that out yet)) you get both extremes ... some people who are super great! And others who are... well... like Leafs Fan... er... not so great.
But so far, I'm not sure I've met a Leafs F... "not nice" person in the community.
I wonder why that is?
Is it the actual process which makes everyone feel a kinship with each other? I know the moment I find out that someone is adopting, it really feels like we should be friends... just because we have that one thing in common. Is it the monumental task of adoption which requires Herculiean strength and will, which makes us all stronger and brings us closer together... like a brother-hood of soldiers fighting the good fight for (and with) each other?
I could see it all now!
It would be like in all the typical guy movies:
- Adopting Private Ryan (where we all fight to finish our adoption process), or
- Rocky XVII: Rocky Adopts (where one of us adopts a little one, and the rest cheer them on as they strive for greatness), or
- The Adoption Kid (where one little adopted child takes on the school bullies), or
- Aliens VS Adoption (where Jet Li can kick some alien butt! Okay, not really adoption related, but c'mon! Jet Li versus some ALIENS?! How AWESOME would THAT be?!), or
- The Godfather (where an adoption agency gives you a referral you can't refuse), or
- Adopt Hard (where some plucky New York Cop played by Bruce Willis decides to adopt), or
- The Dirty Dozen (where a family adopts 12 children), or
For the ladies, I think it might be more like:
- Sleepless in Seattle (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA), or
- Thelma and Louise (where two friends jump in an old broken down convertable and try to drive to China to get their newly adopted children)
- French Kiss (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA (for a french adoption)), or
- Bridget Jones Diary (where a single woman tries to adopt, but keeps complaining that only the pretty mom's get the children)
- You've Got Mail (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA (via email)), or
- Addicted to Love (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA), or
- When Harry Met Sally (where a neurotic Meg Ryan waits impatiently for her LOA), or
- really... ANY movie with Meg Ryan...
The point is, I think we are all walking a long road together, and I think/hope that the whole process brings out the best in us.
We know someone traveling to our orphanage in a couple of weeks to adopt their little one... and sure enough, the family as said they will try to find our little Ping and play with her, and get some pictures of her... and how wonderful is that?
Already, there are people who not only care about us and what we are going through, but they also care about our daughter before we even have her here at home.
That to me, is a "God thing".
Maybe this is just one more lesson for me to learn during this whole process. A process where lessons like,
I can not have all the answers myself,
I can not make things happens the way I want them do,
I can not fix every thing,
I do not have ultimate control,
and others, are learned every day.
But there are other lessons which I've been lucky enough to learn thought this as well. Lessons like,
I can trust that others can take care of things,
I can not rush Gods timing,
There are others who are going through the same things,
There are those I can help/encourage/support,
I do not need to control everything,
and other such lessons.
So to those adopting, and to those supporting those who are adopting... good on you. Continue to encourage those who need encouraging,
lift up those who need lifting,
walk with those who need someone to walk with,
and together, we will triumph, and like those who went before us, bring more love, life and laughter to our family simply by adding TO our family.