The other day I was walking though Wal-Mart with my precious little daughter when we passed by some of the Disney Princess stuff.
Daughter: Daddy! Look! Look at the Princess Pillow!
Me: Yes, it is very nice.
Daughter: Daddy! Can you buy it for me? Pllllleeeeease?!
Now, generally I know when I'm being played. There are often tell tale signs when someone is trying to get something from you. For example, when ever my wife starts a sentence with something like:
- boy you are looking good today.
- have you been working out?
- you remind me of Johnny Depp.
This was one of those "I'm being played" pleases. Fortunately, 10+ years of parenting have prepared me for moments exactly like this.
Me: No baby. You don't need that. You already have a beautiful pillow.
Now my daughter is not used to hearing "No" from her Daddy. She is used to hearing things, maybe like, "Yes", "of course", "no, I don't mind if you crawl all over me, again", "more chocolate?"
But this "no" thing seemed to have left her a little confused.
However, she is smart... as soon as the shock and horror from this "no" word wore off, I could see the gears turning in her head as she started to figure out what to do.
And thats when I heard for the 1st time, something I would start to hear alot more of.
Daughter: Daddy, not for me. For my sister!
I don't think it is really all that important to cover over the rest of the interaction with my lovely daughter here. As the title says, this blog is really all about ulterior motives... and kitchens.
Okay, the "kitchens" isn't obvious in the title... but it will make sense soon. Stay with me just a little longer.
A while ago, my wife was standing in our kitchen looking at the cracked and damaged counter top. I'm not going to try to defend the current state of our counter top. It was from the 1970s, and it was cracked, and maybe a little smashed, and maybe about 2 years ago I took a sledge hammer to the counter top and smashed out 1/3 of the counter top and cupboards to "open up" the kitchen and dining room (as per my wifes instructions).
As my lovely wife talked about replacing the counter tops, I ever so foolishly reminded her that replacing the counter top just wasn't in the budget right now. We were, after all, saving up for the adoption.
Which is when I once again heard that famaliar argument...
Wife: It's not for me. It is for our new baby!
Me: Right. Because our new daughter will obviously want new granite counter tops.
Wife: We have to pass the home study! If we don't pass the home study we won't be able to adopt! And it will all be because you didn't buy me a new counter top!
Me: Fine, get a guy in and get a quote for a new counter top. I'll just work some more over time to pay for it.
So off I go for some over time to pay for said counter top...
... about 13 days later, I finally return home from work...
... it might have been longer...
... I'm not sure.
After the 1st 96 hours or so of stright work it all starts to blurr together.
Me: Hi, I'm home.
Friend #1: Hey! We are SO excited!
Me: Uh, Hi... great... um, what are you doing here?
Wife: Oh, I invited them over to see what we are doing to the kitchen.
Me: We are just replacing the counter top. It's nothi...
Now at this time, I knew something was wrong. I could just feel it. Like a box of chocolate knows it is in danger around Valentines Day, or a Turkey at Thanksgiving, I KNEW there was impending doom for me.
Friend #2: Oh yea! We've been talking for the last couple of days! We're gonna take out that wall there... move those closets to the back of the house... take out those closets, move the fridges, sell the appliances, get new ones, with 2 fridges!
Me: We are?
Wife: And a dish washer! Can you belive it! 11 years of marriage and I'm finally gonna get a dishwasher!
Me: I'm gonna go back to work...
Long store short, the new "counter top" for our "new daughter" to pass our "home study", wound up being a whole new kitchen! We replaced some walls, took some walls out, bought new appliances, re-did the windows, new ceiling, pot lights, and I'm sure so much more... I can't really remeber it all.
My wife just sent me a lovely email with the picture attached of the new kitchen...
... it looks lovely.
I hope one day I will get to see it. But for now... I'm still at work.